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In Defense of the Fatherless: An Interview with the Author

In Defense of the Fatherless

I’ve known Sara Brinton since 2010, when I was hosting Trunk Shows in my own community and dreaming of more for Noonday Collection. Out of the blue, I got an email from Sara explaining that she loved what Noonday was about and she wanted to be a part of it. Together, we developed the Noonday Ambassador Opportunity, empowering women in the United States to create opportunity for Artisans around the world.

Last summer, Sara joined the Noonday team as our Leader of Marketing, and we couldn’t be happier about it. In her free time, when she wasn’t raising four children and working in the fair trade fashion industry, Sara was inspired to write a book about one of her great passions: orphan care and family preservation. Her book, In Defense of the Fatherless, was just published! Sara sat down with me to share the heart behind the book and talk about her own experiences with adoption and orphan prevention.

In Defense of the Fatherless

Tell me a little more of your story. What inspired you to write a book about adoption?

The idea for this book began as many conversations with friends about adoption and orphan care. Our family adopted our daughter Ella from Uganda in 2011. As a white mom of a black daughter, I end up talking about adoption almost every day. I see this as an opportunity – I also see it as a responsibility.

When we began the adoption process, we had no idea what we were getting into. We believed God was calling us to adopt – and our hearts were full of love for a child we had never met.

There were a few moments in our adoption journey that opened my eyes to the truth that good intentions aren’t always enough – and sometimes our best efforts end up hurting the people we want to help. Some children who are growing up in orphanages aren’t orphans: they are there because of poverty. Sometimes adoption agencies find children for families, not families for children. Sadly some people who are involved in caring for vulnerable children are seeking selfish gain.

With eyes wide open, I started the journey of learning more about best practices in orphan care and adoption. Ultimately I felt called to write a book. I invited my friend and fellow advocate Amanda Bennett to join me.

Who did you write this book for?

The book is the conversation I would love to have with a friend who is learning about the orphan crisis or considering adoption. It’s the conversation I wish someone would have had with me several years ago. I have learned so much about adoption and orphan care – much of it the hard way!

I believe children are designed to grow up in families where they are cherished. The millions of children who have been orphaned, abandoned or separated from their families are among the most vulnerable people on the planet – and I believe we have a responsibility to respond.

My hope is that the book challenge, empower and maybe even inspire families and churches to respond to the orphan crisis more holistically.

When people hear the statistics – that there are an estimated 151 million orphans in the world – it’s easy to think that adoption is the answer. But most of the world’s so-called “orphans” live with their families, and these families are often vulnerable. I am passionate about empowering my readers to do something about the poverty, injustice, and brokenness at the root of the orphan crisis.

We are both adoptive moms. What advice would you give a family that feels called to adopt?

I love adoption. I believe it can be a gift to a child who needs a family. It is so important that adoption is about finding families for children, not children for families.

If you feel called to adopt, my advice is really simple: adopt a child who needs to be adopted.

There are thousands of children waiting in foster care in communities across our country who need adoption. If you feel called to adopt internationally, consider adopting a waiting child from a country that has an ethical, transparent adoption system. Whatever you do, trust your intuition. If you see red flags, stop and ask questions and make sure that adoption is really the best choice for the child.

Adoption is painful and beautiful all at the same time. Adoption always involves loss. Families need to be aware of the urgency and the complexity – and to start their journey with eyes wide open.

We are both passionate about empowering women – and this is at the heart of Noonday’s mission too. Why is it important to engage men in this issue?

One of the things I love about Noonday’s approach to poverty alleviation is that it is about creating opportunity for women and men. We know that it is going to take all of us to build a flourishing world where children are cherished.

Three years ago I had the opportunity to travel to Rwanda to meet the Artisans who sew accessories with beautiful African fabric for Noonday. At the time, the women were just launching their business, but they were already so full of hope. Empowering women is powerful.

A few days later, I traveled to Uganda to visit the community where our daughter Gabrielle was born. In Uganda, I was reminded why many kids are vulnerable: their dads are – for lack of better words –behaving badly. Instead of providing for their families, they waste their money on beer.

On my way home from Africa, I began to wonder, “what does it take to get men to provide for their families? How do we connect to the hearts of men so they become dads who cherish their children and empower their wives?”

My journey to answer these questions became the last chapter of the book – my favorite. If we want to end the orphan crisis, we have to address the brokenness that so often leaves women and children – widows and orphans – vulnerable.

How did your journey as a Noonday Ambassador shape your view of adoption and orphan care?

I became a Noonday Ambassador right after our daughter Ella came home from Uganda. This was when I really started exploring how poverty and injustice were connected to the orphan crisis.

I am passionate about creating opportunity for families – and I love that Noonday’s work in Uganda, Rwanda and around the world empowers families to care for their children. I love how Noonday celebrates and supports adoption while also giving thousands of families the opportunity they need to thrive.

fatherlessbookThanks so much to Sara, both for sharing her heart with us and for putting it on paper for everyone to benefit from. I’m so proud of what she has done with In Defense of the Fatherless, and I know that it will be an essential resource for everyone interested in orphan care and orphan prevention. In Defense of the Fatherless is available for purchase now!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Meet Jessica Honegger

Jessica is Noonday Collection’s Founder and Chief Dreamer. Jessica spends her days inspiring others to live lives of purpose—from empowering our Ambassadors to be powerful storytellers and stylists, to visiting and encouraging our Artisans partners across the globe. After hours, Jessica can be found relaxing with her husband, dancing with her three children, and enjoying a good book.